The Spirit

I love Frank Miller.

I loved Sin City, The Dark Knight, 300.

Okay, now that’s out the way...

...I hated this film.

Those that know me know I hate not watching a film through to the end, however bad it is.

This has resulted in me watching some real dross over the years.

Occasionally though, I do pull the plug.

I really tried to like this; it’s very stylish, shot like Sin City. But after being spoilt with a summer of blockbusters like Batman and Iron Man I expect a little bit more from my super hero adaptations.

The acting is terrible, over hammy, the effects are now, in my mind, a little stale, and the story is just all over the place.

Yes, I know the graphic novel and I know how it is meant to be portrayed, but the film missed the mark by several thousand meters.

I fell asleep...twice!

Sorry, Frank, I’ve worshipped everything you have done before, but I draw the line here. I don’t know how this film ends, and for once...I really don’t care.

However, it does deserve a couple of points for the ‘boyhood fantasy’ looking women.

Meh! Rating 2/10

JCVD

Having grown up in the 80’s, my staple diet consisted of larger than life action movies.

I can remember watching the original Kick Boxer movie maybe 5 or 6 times in a row after convincing, an obviously unsuitable, adult career to hire it for me. Jean-Claude Van Damme was one of the great martial arts stars of the time, and one of the most prolific actors around this period for big dumb action flicks.

Who would have guessed he could act? Or be willing to self deprecate himself so much that I would actually feel emotions, during one of his films, that were not based on pure adrenaline.

The plot, not that it really matters focuses on Jean Claude Van Damme, playing himself, returning to Brussels.

He has had a bad run of event. Down on his luck, out of money, in the midst of a difficult custardy battle for his daughter, and, ever worse, losing out to Steven Seagal for a movie role (Steven apparently agreed to cut off his pony tail to win the part!)

Returning to his home to seeks out some peace and quiet, things go from bad to worse when he ends up in the middle of a post office robbery.

The film is wonderful. I don’t want to say too much as to ruin what happens. The film shows a completely different side to Jean Claude. Don’t go in expecting an action film, this is different. It's a satirical documentary about his life, contained within a darkly comedic bank heist movie

Meh! Rating 8/10

Nokia 5800 Xpressmusic

First things first, I love this phone.

To me, this is one of the best phones I have ever used and probably one of the best on the market at present (pound for pound – use see how I cover myself there)

Remember these phones only cost, here in the UK, £250 off contract. What you get for this price is outstanding.

First the bad, and there is one thing that I am a little worried about. Build quality. The phone feels sturdy enough, but this is my second device. I have already RMA’d one to Nokia because the screen housing started to come lose, and if you search the interweb you will see many stories about speaker problems with the first batch of these. I shall just have to wait to see if I am affected.

Ok, now to the good.

Before this I had a Nokia N95 8gb. That phone was almost perfect, but after owning an Ipod touch for a while, and playing with many iPhones, I soon realised I really needed the touch interface. A keypad is just too restricting. I need everything else too though, GPS, decent camera, media playback, etc.

I thought about getting an iPhone on many occasions, but there were too many limiting factors. All the bits that are good about it I have on my Touch, everything else about it was too limiting. Obviously I could have gone windows mobile with one of the sexy HTC devices, but I have had several WinMo phones in the past and they have driven me to distraction. I really do not need to wait 5 minutes to make a phone call while my phone ‘boots’. As touchy feely as these 3^rd party finger touch skins, the likes of HTC and Samsung have put on top of windows mobile, are the OS is still there always waiting to pop up and stump you.

Enter the 5800. It has the s60 OS, which I really am a fan of, a decent camera, GPS, media capabilities, and everything else on my list.

So the camera is not the best on the market, but, outside in good light, it takes a fine picture.

The GPS is fast at locking onto satellites, much, much faster than my n95. I just need a 3^rd party (Garmin come on!) to release decent navigation software.

The screen is wonderful, video look lovely and crisp and the sound is top notch. A standard headphone socket is a boon.

The Touch interface works really well. It took a while to get used to, but now I know my way around it is like second nature. Despite the screen technology chosen I find it extremely responsive.

The phone size is just perfect. It has the typical candy bar dimensions and feels just right in the hand.

Obviously, being a Nokia phone, the integration with my PC for synching and such is second to none.

So, there you go, considering I splashed out and bought this offline at full price, on launch day, I am very happy. It will do me for a while (well, at least until the n97 comes along)

Meh! Rating 8/10

Underworld: Rise of the Lycans

Poor.

I guess I should write a little more.

This third film in the underworld franchise is a prequel.

Throughout the previous two films there is a lot of back story, discussed, narrated, alluded to, etc.

This film tells that story.

Unfortunately, the script is poor, the acting is subpar, the effects are dodgy and the whole thing is just too dark. I don’t mean ‘man this is a dark film; I need to go slit my wrists’, I mean what just happened? Some badly formed CGI just attacked some other badly formed Cgi and ripped something off and...oh whatever.

Yes, I get this is a gothic setting and feel, and yes on paper this film ticks many (many!) of my boxes. Who does not like the idea of Werewolves battling vampires in a gothic setting? But, This film is just such a letdown. To me it reeks of cash-in, and it shows.

Meh! Rating 3/10

Defiance

A World War 2 holocaust movie starring James Bond, err, I mean, Daniel Craig, as one of three brothers who escape a Nazi raid on their family farm, Russia 1941. They take refuge in the surrounding forest, and survive in the wilderness by setting up a small community with others who had also lost everything to the Nazi invaders.

It’s not what you expect; here the Jews are fighting back, so it is not an uncomfortable view, like other films based on the subject matter. There is one scene depicting, what can be described as, a mass grave, but it is shot in such a way that the result is not as unsettling as you would expect.

There are scenes of action, but the film is more about the drama, the relationships that are established and evolve. When the violence does come, its result is only more shocking because of the investment you, the viewer, has made in the players.

The film is very focused on this band of people, thrown together by the terrible atrocities afflicted on them by the viciously portrayed Nazi soldiers and informers. Although alluded to, you don’t really get a sense of the bigger picture, the war ranging all around Europe at this time and its impact on these people.

The film, to me, was just a little hollow. When the credits rolled, there was no feeling. I was not upset about anything in the portrayal, The film is based on a true storry, and I belive the film kept to this, but I... I just felt nothing. I was not moved, which given the subject matter, I really expected to be.

Not a bad film, but nothing special.

Meh! Rating 6/10